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aiyoyoyoyooyoyoyo
because something happened, i have to write my new wishlist again. hehe
1. back to school and able to handle all problems that i will meet.. it has been really long time no studying for me.. aiyo.. probably i will be worse than those secondary fresh graduate... aiks..
2.new house, new car, new bed, new furniture, new ps3, new office table.. god, give me some money please...
3. go jogging twice a week since i going to move a new place nearby a park
4. quit my bad habits and start treating myself nicely
5. now i learn how to stand in fornt of mirror every morning and start the day with a smile. =)
i want to be a happy woman again. like sunshine to warm your heart. =P
6. be good to my parents..
7. study hard and get the degree back with flying colour result. hahahahaahaa
8. improve my English, especially the grammer and pronunciation.
9. love those who love me and support me. ^^ thank you all for being supportive..
what made me suddenly changed my mind and life? because a strength from someone pushed me to do the things i really want.. that person asked me a question, where i am... i dunno how to answer him. but this sentence keep reminding me in my mind.. the next day morning, i woke up and looking out windows.. asking myself, is this the life u wish? i think it deeply...
i took out those brochures i keep inside the drawer since long time ago..
i really there was 3 men in my life told me that , they hope i can be better, and they hope i can fulfill my dream, have further studies.
One of them even taught me English and forced me to read English magazines, English books. He claimed he can help me to improve my English within a year and able to speak fluently like him. Although he left me at the end, but, i can't forget the moment when he said this, " Denise, i hope i can save you..."
lolzz... how pitiful i am when a guy told me that, seems nobody can really understand my feeling..
i gave up my further studies because someone caused a serious mistakes when the time i supposed to enter university. i had no choice but give up and work to earn money and tried hard to solve every problems. i angry i felt bad i blamed everything on them, thinking that they were the one who turn me into this messy life. But, since everything has been solved and past.. why shdn't i change and get what i want now? i should put down everything and do something for myself start from now! i wasted too much times on somebody else in the past.. i don't want to live with regrets anymore...
yesterday i called back home, and told my mum i decided back to school again.. my mum agreed with me and said she will help me when i need.. she even cried out and said.. it's not too late yet to do the things that i always wanted... i'm glad... my friends support me too.. some of them even told me to pay them tuition fees if i dunno how to do assignments and projects.. lolz.. yea. he was right, it's really a big price if we want to simplify our life and start anew life and it's really no easy for me too. But, this time, i really wan to cheer myself up but no more dissappointment.. i will do my best..
god bless me .. mum, i am guilty that i alwaya blame our family and made you feel bad too..i am learning to love you all again.. i will be good again, like your long lost obedient daughter again.... trust me..i can do it..
